I noticed tonight that the things and decisions I make are shaping the good old days of my life. One day I will look back on the things that I am currently doing and I will be like, huh. I don't know if that 'huh' is a good 'huh' or a bad 'huh' as of now, because I feel like the activities that I occupy my free time with are good things. I believe that I'm trying to direct myself down a path that I'm happiest with. I could be wrong though. I probably am.
I am not a superstitious, but I'm a fan of positive thinking and hope. I also am a fan of luck. I don't have a lot of it, but why not avoid things that bring bad luck, and be hopeful with any goody lucky things that come your way?
I bought a dream catcher the other day at a Native American Pow Wow thing that my school was hosting because honestly the past week I have been having the worst long lasting nightmares. Seriously such disturbing and depressing things kept happening. (Honestly I'm convinced they are all a reflection of my current emotional state, so I'm blaming that.) You guys read my blog about that one bomb. It was a way weird dream, and they just started getting scarier and scarier. But hey, guess what, last night was my first night sleeping with a dream catcher above me and I had an actual GOOD dream. I remember it vividly and it was a very nice dream. Indians know cool stuff I tell you.
Also, I wish on the exact same thing every time I see a shooting star. It actually changed like 5 months or so ago. But it used to be that I would be happy. I wished that every single time I saw one and it took a while for it to happen, but it finally did, so I changed it. Eeeeven though the happiness is still something I struggle with. I'm just hoping this wish doesn't take as long.
One day I was driving down 9th East with my windows down one afternoon this fall and out of nowhere a leaf flew into my car from my passenger side and landed right onto the passengers seat. I hurried and rolled up my window because I didn't want it to fly away or get lost. I looked at the leaf and decided. Thats good luck. I cant even think of any time when I feel like that particular scene brought me any luck at all, but I want all of you to know (and feel free to pass it around) that when a leaf flies into your car while you're driving. I consider it to be good luck. That leaf is saved in my box of random things that I'm glad I have.
How does this all tie into my introduction to this blog you may be wondering? They don't really. Well, I wasn't trying to, but I guess they could tie together. Positive thinking and hoping for the best is all we can really do when we are going through all the crap that we go through. If I want to look back onto the times that I'm living right now, I don't want to remember this emo side of me that you're always reading about on this blog. So if you ever see a shooting star or make a wish on something that you think brings luck. That'd be cool of you to spare that wish and wish it on me, because I need it right now, and maybe it would help.
Sidenoteeeeeee. if you guys arent facebook friends with me, then you do not know about this video. So here you go my friends.
3 comments:
Such a GREAT video! Beautiful job.
Gav, we must be kindred souls. I too believe in positive thinking and most definitely luck!! While I was dating Aaron, whenever I saw a shooting star or caught the first star of the night, I wished to marry Aaron. It took two years but it came true. If I had a leaf fly into my car on a beautiful Autumn day, I would've done the exact same thing you did...roll up the windows and put it in my box of precious things. About a month ago I was sitting on the back deck when I saw a black butterfly and a yellow butterfly, flying together and appeared to be playing. Light and dark, ups and downs, despair and joy. It's all a part of the journey. We can't have one without the other. Hang in there sweetie. I love you.
Thanks man, I appreciate it! I know what you mean with this whole happiness business. We can't hope to be happy all the time, it would lose its value. Chin up, better days are coming.
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