Thursday, March 27, 2014


I don't blog anymore. But this time of year I always think of this blog and how much I used to love writing in it. Its a big nostalgia thing and I'm probably the biggest fan of nostalgia. I'm always talking in the past. I really think I suck at living in the present because as soon as something has happened I dwell on it long enough to forget about what is happening right here and now. Probably a problem, probably don't care haha.

Well I felt like writing this in here because I did something that I would have written about five years ago. Tonight my friend Lindsey turned 23 so the night went as follows.

Her boyfriend had her up until 10 but I didn't care because I knew he would get to have her and tomorrow is her real birthday so I mostly needed to make sure I would have her at midnight because for the last three years we have done this thing where we dance and sing to Taylor Swift as it turns midnight and I'll never know how or why it happened but it just does. So I went to Albertsons and bought her Cadberry Caramel chocolates that we first discovered when we were in London together and since shes on a diet so I got her diet coke for the drive and the rest of her present I just bought her a shiz ton of Altoids because she has a boyfriend.

I wanted to pretend that we were going on a road trip with all of these things because we were supposed to go to Disneyland for her spring break but that just didn't work out. And I told her what the plan was and it was that five years ago pretty much exactly, I had this emotional breakdown, freaking out about gay stuff, my mission, and my life basically. I told her that I went on this exact drive and just cried until I came to the south west side of Utah Lake and cried more and decided that I was done with the crap I had put up with the year before and what I was going to do the next year. So I brought roman candles, and paper. On all of the pieces of paper we wrote things we were going to stop doing, and things about ourself that are negative and my goal was for us to shoot the roman candles at the papers while shouting Harry Potter curses at them. It had just rained so everything looked awesome and the twilight that was cast over us from the lights across the lake made for a dang good setting for harry potter crap to go down. But when we shot the roman candles at our pieces of paper we found out that we would lose against dementors and dark wizards because we did not hit a single piece of paper. There were 10 pages all lined up in a row and we didn't hit a single one haha. So we just shot roman candles over the lake shouting things instead because that looks cooler and theres less stress. Then it started to rain so we danced to some pre taylor jams and tried lighting the pieces of paper on fire instead but they were too wet so we decided that letting them rot under the rain was sufficient enough.

Then we went on the road that I took that one night five years ago and we talked about all the things that went down during the last year and just kind of talked through all of it until I brought us to these orchards that I've always loved but was too scared to stop at. I think anna and I stopped once, but people were out collecting the fruit in them so I never got to hang out. But it is a wednesday night at 11:30 so Nobody gave a crap. There was a path that divided hundreds of trees, kind of like the path that couples stand in while taking bridals, actually exactly like that but there wasnt a dirt path it was just lush green grass and everything was wet but it wasnt raining so I angled my car so that my brights lit up the path and we blasted Taylor and walked down it. There was tons of lighting from the clouds so it was way cool. It just looked pretty perfect so we decided that she would turn 23 right there. We just walked around until 11:58 and blasted Taylors "22" song and somehow we ended up in our underwear but we were screaming and dancing so it wasn't cold when you could see our breath like crazy. It was so perfect. We thought we were too tired but we were dead wrong because shuffle kept playing and we just screamed and danced for two more songs.

So after that we finished the drive on the road I took and did not stop to talk for another half hour we just screamed taylor songs out the window and danced and honestly I don't think I was being safe at all. A lot of things could have killed us now that I think about it but whatever. We found the nearest McDonalds, went and looked at the Payson Temple that is under construction which is perfect. And then we just listened to taylor until 1:30 until I dropped her off. All I know is that it was perfect and too many things about it reminded me of how perfect Lindsey is and I'm just happy she likes being stupid and dumb with me because I don't know how many more years I'll be lucky enough to have so many single girlfriends.

Don't know if I'll keep posting on here. It feels pretty weird.